Local Man Upset He Doesn't Find Actress Attractive
Published February 2026 0 Comments | Share:
Jason Newtbury says he will not watch a popular show until they replace the lead actress with someone he finds attractive.
RICHMOND, KY – Local man Jason Newtbury is upset that he does not find the lead actress of a popular show “hot” and is vowing to boycott the show until the actress is replaced with someone Newtbury finds attractive.
“I can’t believe they hired some weird lookin’ chick for that show,” said Newtbury. “When I turn on my TV, I want to see people that I want to have relations with… not some… normal lookin’ chick! If I wanted to see a normal lookin’ chick I’d go to Walmart. I ain’t gonna watch that show ‘til they fix it.”
Immediately after watching the first episode of the show, “The Batango Prophecy”, Newtbury posted 1,302 comments on Reddit declaring his dislike for the casting and his opinion of the actress’s appearance.
“Yeah, I got on Reddit and made sure that everyone knew that I don’t want to have relations with that actress,” said Newtbury. “I stayed up pretty darn late respondin’ to every post I could find about the show and made it clear that one, I did not find that main chick hot and two, they should find someone to replace her that I do find hot, so I don’t feel weird pleasurin’ myself while watchin’ the show. That’s all I really want to do. Sure, I could go on the internet and find all kinds of messed up porn, but no, I’d rather find someone hot on the TV and pull on my pud. Like God intended!”
Newtbury’s friends saw the comments on Reddit but did not respond.
“(Newtbury) does that a lot,” said Stan Geleesen. “When you ain’t got no job and the only thing you got is watchin’ TV with your mom I guess you gotta get your anger out somewheres. Personally, I don’t feel the need to find all the TV people good lookin’ so I just don’t worry myself about it.”
Although he is boycotting the show, Newtbury has said he will continue his Reddit comment posting after each episode airs until the actress is replaced.
“I got time, man,” said Newtbury. “So, if they gonna keep the weird lookin’ chick on the show I’m gonna keep lettin’ everyone know I don’t like it and that they should put someone hot on there, so my boner feels more natural. At the very least, I would do a compromise, if the producers put the weird lookin’ chick in a bikini or some pretty lingerie. At that point, I can get past her so called ‘conventional’ good looks. At least then I can concentrate on what’s important – her tits. Her tits are what’s important. For me to masturbate to.”
Comments